My Dad's Advice on Women

I recently wrote my dad an email about women. In the two sentence note I asked for some advice. What I received not only came in chapters, it also cast doubt on whether my dad actually works while at work. I've decided to share his advice with you so that you too may learn from the all knowing middle-aged white man.

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Cody,

I know you're a grown man and all, but I think I can give you some good advice about women if you want it. I can't claim I knew this when I was your age. But, think about what you want in a wife...Don't get nervous. I'm not trying to push you in that direction, because I don't think you're ready for it.

Think about what you want in a woman... Athletic, Good figure, Pretty Face, Christian, Sharp witted (someone who has a good and funny come back line), Kind and Caring Personality, In control of her habits (buying, drinking, drugs, etc.), Wealthy Daddy who wants to see his daughter live well no matter who she marries, Low Maintenance (not too spoiled), Good job but supportive of your career goals, Articulate and intelligent (but not so smart that she thinks you are dumb), Willing to sacrifice for your interests, Good genes, Good health, Reasonable stature (so your not going to raise a bunch of midgets), Reasonably close to your age, Same interest and timing for children, etc.

I realize some of these are going to conflict with the others but you get the point. No woman will have all these things. And, then let's be honest, if she does, what have you got that would make her want only you?

Keep in mind, if she's got all these things she's going to have her list too. What's the chances that her list will include: Find a man who's making $12.00 an hour and whose family doesn't have any money. (By the way, that's you.) Slim to none. Find a woman that isn't looking to get married in the next couple of years. That cuts out most of the women your age. If it means you are looking for a fresh college graduate, then fine. Look for one who can share your dream of moving up in the TV markets, but who isn't going to be required to live on the salary you can provide at this time. Look for a woman who is willing to adjust her own career goals. If she's already working in her chosen career, by the time you're ready to move up, she'll be established in her job and will have to choose between her career dream and the relationship. That sometimes causes trouble. Even if she could move and find another job, she'll be at a disadvantage for employment if her employer knows that she's going to pick up and move everytime you get a promotion. You need to start frequenting areas where girls like the ones you're looking for hang out. Try church.

Thanks Dad.