My Brother is still "Perfect"

Great news everybody! My brother got ANOTHER raise!!! YEA!!!!!!!!

Seriously, this is getting to be a bi-monthly kick in the crotch.

How much money can this boy make before he hits puberty? Not only is he two years younger than I am, but he can now literally buy and sell his older brother.

If he were to offer me 30-grand a year to be his pool boy, I would seriously consider it. Maybe he'll even let me live in his guest room. Better yet, his pool house. Then maybe I'll be able to take on my dream title of "Starving Writer. Will work for chlorine."

Look, I'm proud of by little-bigger bro' (did I mention he's 5 inches taller than I am?). He's worked hard to get where he is today. He also picked a profession that pays more than mine does.

No, I thought I wanted to write about things that would make a difference in the world. Instead, my job responsibility includes writing promotional pieces for the highest bidder and taking whatever "payola" I can from people.. like those at the Prague Kolachi Festival. "Here Cozy.. I thought you could use a few delicious kolachi's. Free of charge of course. (wink, wink)." Of course.

Did I mention I love my brother?